I'm about to eat a cupcake, I think.

My favorite movie this decade was Pride & Prejudice: A Latter-Day Comedy. This gem of a modernized Mormon Jane Austen film is very pink and enjoyable; in my soul of souls, after seeing this film, I wished I were a Mormon student at Brigham Young University. I nursed this secret for several long years, but I didn't give up coffee, which I eventually realized I liked too much to relinquish (as a proper Mormon would be obligated to do). After this realization, I started looking for a different secret to nurse. Like the mama of a suckling pig. The secret being the suckling pig itself. I had to find a new suckling pig after I gave the old one up for adoption. In that I abandoned my furtive dreams of Mormonism.

This is 2010: let's welcome the new decade by revisiting our old daydreams about life as a Latter-Day Saint.